Break Up. Break Down. Break Open.

Love is rarely killed in a single moment.  Its death comes as a result of countless slights, ignores, denials and less respect and honor than it deserves.

Loving something requires more courage than any other journey we embark on.  You risk everything, leaving yourself open to pain and loss.

I actually appreciate break ups.  Maybe not in the moment, but after crying in the bathtub, drinking a bottle of wine, and eating too much ice cream, THEN I actually appreciate breakups.

Break Ups Aren’t About Boys

One of the hardest breakups I’ve experienced wan’t because of a boy, it was because of a job.

I loved my job and for a long time everything was great.  I poured my heart and soul into this job, but much like this past relationship it started taking more than that it was giving and I allowed it.

Breakups aren’t about boys, they are about losing something you wanted.  The reason breakups happen is because something isn’t working:

  • Maybe it is the push you need to go in another direction.

  • Maybe you are what isn’t working and you have something to learn.

  • Maybe the relationship just isn’t serving you any longer.

Instead of focusing on the loss, the pain or the circumstance you can’t control or change, use breakups as a chance to create the space for something you need.

Break Open

When things hurt, we want to numb the pain.  Anything to make that awful feeling go away but that merely delays the problem, it doesn’t actually make it go away.

There is no magic pill, no quick fix, and if you manage to avoid dealing with it now – it will come back around I promise!

This isn’t a guarantee that it will make you will feel better.  I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but this is probably going to hurt ... growing pains usually do.

Learn to love the Break Up.  Why?

  • It forces you to reflect, evaluate and hopefully learn something

  • You can find gratitude for the people, places, or things in your life you really love

  • It is a chance to do learn from what happened and do things differently

  • The pain of loss means you took a risk and put yourself out there

  • You feel … deeply. This is a gift.

  • It’s an opportunity to grow if you let it

When you are dealing with a breakup, instead of breaking down … take a long look in the mirror, put on your big girl pants and choose to be Broken Open instead.